3 Tips To Let Go Of Attachment: Be Free From Emotional Dependency Now
"The root of suffering
is attachment."
-Buddha
is attachment."
-Buddha
Happiness and a feeling of security are fundamental human emotions we all seek throughout life. It is something we all have in common.
And yet, the happiness we desperately seek or cling to often becomes a source of misery once we allow outside circumstances to dictate our level of contentment, satisfaction and enjoyment.
Once we become dependent on outside circumstances over which we have little control, it often becomes an attachment. It is something or someone we so desperately cling to in the desperate hope of not losing that false sense of security and perceived happiness.
Attachments often stem from fear of change or the unknown. So it is when we become too rooted in our comfort zones and will do everything we can to stay there.
But ultimately, this is a false sense of security and a surefire way of missing out on life's opportunities. Inevitably, an attachment may lead to misery and suffering if left unchecked.
Do you suspect you may be attached to certain circumstances?
If so, you are certainly not alone. Read on to discover the warning signs and what you can do to break unhealthy or detrimental attachments so you can begin to take responsibility for your happiness.
What Is An Attachment?
Attachment is a profound feeling, emotion or unwillingness to release oneself from a relationship or circumstance. Such emotions and feelings can be positive and healthy most of the time. For example, having strong feelings towards a cause or spiritual belief can help our wellbeing.
Falling in love with someone creates strong bonds that are profoundly fulfilling, with healthy respect and admiration two people have for each other. It's a genuinely exciting experience.
But things can become damaging and detrimental to our personal growth if we cannot let go of a relationship or circumstance. Or we become entirely dependent on another person for our happiness and emotional needs to be met.
Refusing to accept that a relationship is over, or worse still, putting up with a bad relationship through fear of the unknown or being alone means settling for a mediocre life and wasted opportunities.
Clinging to an unfulfilling job through fear of seeking new opportunities may be seen as another example of attachment, along with holding onto the belief things we will be okay.
What Are The Signs Of Being Attached To Someone?
When you enjoy a healthy relationship with another person, whether romantic or simply friendship, emotional attachment can be a very positive experience; it forms a deep emotional bond that may lead to attraction, connection, closeness and understanding.
However, it can become unhealthy and problematic if a person becomes too attached, which could affect their mental wellbeing resulting in anxiety, stress and even depression.
Depending on and relying on another to meet your needs and happiness will eventually lead to misery and suffering.
Here are a few warning signs that may signal a potential problem:
Clingy or being over-protective
Jealousy
Frequently trolling the other person's social media
Not allowing yourself and the other person time alone with friends, family or hobbies.
How Do You Release Yourself From An Attachment?
Fear of change, uncertainty or the worry of being alone or trying something new can manifest into feelings of not being good enough or underserving of something better.
Making positive things happen to better your life means breaking out of your comfort zone, facing fear and growing mentally stronger.
It can be challenging to break free from an attachment, but it's important to remember that you're not alone and that you can do it.
Here are a few tips to help you to let go:
1. Seek advice from others who have experienced the same thing. Many communities have local support groups where you can seek help and encouragement from others.
2. Let go of the past. The past is the past, and you cannot change it. So instead, focus on living in the present while making plans for the future.
3. Be honest with yourself. Know that the longer you don't let go will only extend the pain and suffering. Push yourself out of your comfort zone to grow mentally and spiritually while seeking new opportunities.
The Importance Of Letting Go
Once we accept the fact there will always be certain outside circumstances we cannot control, we can then begin to change our attitude and the way we react to such situations. That is more powerful and beneficial than many people realise.
Once we let go of that which no longer brings us happiness or spiritual growth, we can begin to open up to the possibility of new exciting opportunities coming into our lives.
If we let go of our grudges, we may find peace. By letting go of our anger, we can be more loving. When we let go of our expectations, we can be more accepting, and when we break away from attachment, we become free in mind, body and spirit.
Today's Takeaway
Being able to connect with a partner is never a bad thing; it's human nature and is the foundation of the joy of being in love. However, it's about recognising the signs and realising when an emotional attachment is edging towards dependency, which could have a detrimental effect on the wellbeing of those involved.
Depending on another person for your emotional needs to be met results in suffering. It often stems from low self-esteem or lack of confidence.
Once you know the line that separates a healthy fondness from a detrimental unhealthy attachment, you will no longer feel helpless or reliant on another person for your happiness and emotional needs.
Taking ownership of your happiness gives you freedom and self-dependence while respecting and enjoying the fondness and connection you share with the other person.
Letting go of attachment is like breaking the chains holding you back from living life to the fullest. You will become free!
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